Friday, December 2, 2016

Yoshiette Adventures #8: Yoshiette goes to Japan

DISCLAIMER:
THIS IS NOT AN ACCURATE DEPICTION OF GOING TO JAPAN, IF I OFFENDED ANYONE WITH MY EXAGGERATED AND FICTIONALIZED STORY, I DO APOLOGIZE!!!!


Joe Tokugawa: I want to return to Japan since Trump is going to be president in just over a month...

A. Yoshi: Isn't Yoshiette looking for a friend to to japan with? You know, to get Christmas KFC...

JT: Thanks for telling me I should pack...







Before the Flight


Yoshiette 1: OK good, but remove the cocaine.

JT: But I was able to bring it when I lived there...

YE1: Doesn't matter, you're not allowed to bring drugs to Japan.

JT: F**K!!!!!

Midway into the flight

My brother was a sumo wrestler, and he competes in competitive matches. Also he called me a nerd. If you want to see tapes of my brother's matches, feel free to ask.

YE1: OH MY GOD!!!! COULD I BE EVEN MORE BORED FOR 6 AND A HALF HOURS STRAIGHT!!!!

JT: can we visit my father's Country estate in Kyoto?

YE1: Yes, but we're staying in a hotel Tokyo...


Day 1: Tokyo:


Don't you even think about breaking the bank here, or you're fired...

JT: Ummm.... put some sort of dress on, you shouldn't be wearing christmas lingerie in public japan, also no cleavage.

Later at the hotel...

YE1: So let's plan our month here. This week we'll be going all around Tokyo, next week It's Osaka, and for the last few days of the trip we'll be going to your father's country estate...


Day 2: Lunch at Nogata Hope:


JT: Can I get some snacks at the 7 Eleven?

YE1: Maybe later, you'll want to buy everything at the store...

Where do you want to have lunch?

JT: Maybe a ramen shop?

So we both ordered a slightly greasy shio ramen with gyoza dumplings and rice. It's important say Itadakimasu because it's proper manners.

YE1: Let me guess, you don't want want me to slurp?

JT: You Can. Slurp away.

YE1: YIPEE!!!!

Later At Azabu Juban district.

JT: I'm Thirsty, can we go the 7 Eleven?

YE1: There's a Vending Machine by the onsen we're going to, just wait an hour and we'll get our drinks.

10 minutes later

JT: Well this sucks, I'm in a onsen with all guys... well it should be worth it when I get my Sailor Moon Soda...


After the Onsen...


YE1: For dinner we're getting a hot lunch from a vending machine, Sio Ramen, and whatever drink you want...

Buys Hot Onigiri, Fried Chicken and Potato, ramen, and 2 Sailor Moon Sodas.

JT: Let's call a taxi, I don't want to have food on the train.

YE1: I bought some gum from that vending machine, let me have this mint flavored... OH MY GOD!!!! IT'S NOT GUM, IT'S CIGARETTES!!!!!

JT: What was your first clue? That it costs 430 yen, or the fact you saw the Marlboro Logo on the machine?

Later that night

YE1: Tomorrow we're going to have lunch at the Gundam Cafe. then exploring the Akihabara...


Day 3: Akihabara


I love this restaurant, It's kind of a shame Yoshi won't like this because he's such a picky eater.

JT: Can I get a gashapon from this store?

YE1: Yes but only spend 50 bucks...

Later

YOU SPENT HOW MUCH?!

JT: 10,000 yen...

YE1: Next Time if you want something that bad, just use your debit card.

4:00 PM: Super Potato

I Think I'll get my Yoshi Poo a boxed copy of Kirby 64. are you getting anything?

JT: A MSX2, and boxed copies of Metal Gear 2 and SD Snatcher...

Can we just go home so i can get a meal from the 7 Eleven, and fill up my funds.

YE1: No I want to play arcade games at the Sega Gigo.

JT: It'll only take 20 minutes to 7 Eleven and back...

YE1: Fine, just meet me at the Gigo.


20 minutes later


JT: Hello ma'am. want some of my Fanta Melon or Chicken Sandwich

YE1: HOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYOYO!!!!! Did you have to scare me like that?

Great I lost my playthrough, now I HAVE TO Put in 100 yen to start a new game. Go make yourself scarce, play some games and we'll meet 6:30.

7:00 PM: Pachinko Parlor.

*Whispers* I Think this place is going to give me a seizure.

JT: *Whispers* Me Too, but I want to enjoy the night life...


???: have you seen this guy?

YE1: Yes He's siting next to me.

Mystery man punches both Yoshiette and Joe.

10:00 PM: Undisclosed Location

Yakuza Member: welcome to the Yakuza, here you'll be waiting for your execution and your Yoshi-poo has 3 weeks to pay a 1 Billion Yen Ransom if you want to survive.

YE1: What's 1 billion yen in US Money?

JT: Not Good.


Will Yoshiette 1 and Joe Tokugawa escape from the Yakuza base and have a KFC Christmas, or will they be executed, Find out on the 25h as we conclude this screwed up Story...

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